Dear Readers,
It’s that time of year again… the Christmas holidays and the new year is coming up.
It’s winter, it’s supposed to be cozy. The perfect time for family and being with a partner. But what happens if you don’t have that?
Let’s admit it, feeling lonely sucks, and although everybody feels lonely at times, as an ACE it feels like it’s even more complicated. Fewer people understand or feel like you
I can understand that people want somebody who loves and cares for them. And I have to admit, sometimes it would be really nice to have that special someone in my life. But forcing it doesn’t work!
Acknowledging that you feel lonely is important. There is no problem with that, we all feel lonely sometimes, it’s not something ACE-exclusive.
But what can you do to feel better?
I think one of the most important connections we have in life are our friendships.
I immediately feel better when I can talk to my friends and in my case, sometimes that means I have to wait. Cause one of my best friends is literally living on the other side of the world.
Spend time with your friends and let them know how much you appreciate them. Or call them, if you are living too far apart to meet up. I’m sure they will be very happy to hear from you or see you.
Go out to get some good food, cook for them, have a good long conversation, or do something fun together. Just spend some quality time together. It really makes a difference and it will make you feel a lot better.
The second thing you can do, is finding a hobby that interests you. Especially during this time of year and with the upcoming holidays you will have a lot of time to dive fully into what you love.
I really love reading so my reading list for the holidays is a mile long.
Another important thing, that we tend to ignore throughout the year is to take time for ourselves. Cook a fancy meal for yourself, hit the gym or dance and sing at home as loud as you can if that makes you feel good.
“If it makes you happy
It can’t be that bad
If it makes you happy
Then why the hell are you so sad?”
( If it makes you happy – Sheryl Crow)
And then there’s the possibility to be pro-active. It’s not always about the big gestures: If you read a post from a fellow ACE or non-ACE that they feel alone, write a nice message. Maybe you can just have a chat, maybe you have the opportunity to have a quick call and maybe by doing that, you will find a new friend or even someone who could be more. You never know!
What do you do to not feel alone?
Yours, Ace
I also like to read, although now that I’m older there somehow seems to be less time for that, I write things down, like poems, I make lists, I organise physical things, like medicines, I create disorganised intangible things like the aforementioned poetry and little anecdotes that I share with certain online friends.
Hello Reshmi, that sounds really good! I would really like to read a peom of yours!
Best, Ace