Dear Readers,
When I thought of asexuality before I discovered that it’s a spectrum I thought of sex repulsion. Not realizing that also non-ACEs can be sex-repulsed. Asexuality and sex-repulsion are two very different things. Sex repulsion can be temporary whereas asexuality isn´t. One has purely to do with the attraction you feel towards others whereas the repulsion can either be directed towards the physical act and what´s connected to it or certain aspects of it.
But as anything on the ACE spectrum sex-repulsion is also a spectrum in itself.
This is what the spectrum looks like:
Sex-repulsed describes people who may find sexual activity undesirable, uncomfortable, or generally unwanted. This can lead to physical reactions like panic attacks, or nausea and can be connected to a feeling of disgust.
Sex-averse describes people who find the thought of engaging in sexual activities themselves repulsive, but are either indifferent or even favorable towards sexual content or activities that don’t involve them or of sex as a general concept.
The term sex-ambivalent describes people who find some sexual activities repulsive whereas they are favorable towards others.
Sex-drained is used to describe people who are repulsed towards sexual interactions due to trauma or exhaustion.
This shows that sex-repulsion is experienced differently by different people.
But what can cause sex repulsion?
The first thing that comes to mind is sexual trauma. But also learned shame and distress associated with sex, maturation or sexual fantasies, negative self-talk after sexual activities, and a negative body image can have a great impact.
How can you support sex-repulsed people?
It always helps to ask politely about their boundaries. Since everybody is different it´s good to know what is ok for the other person and what is not. Especially in a relationship it´s important to build trust and being supportive.
Unfortunately, some people might confuse sex-repulsion with sex-negativity. Sex negativity is not part of the sex-repulsed spectrum. Sex-negativity is a political stance to ban sexual content from for example books or movies.
(Sources: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sexopedia/a37181073/sex-repulsed/, https://fashionjournal.com.au/life/sex-repulsed-asexual/,https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/sexually-repressed#breaking-the-cycle, https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Sex-Repulsed, https://www.allohealth.care/healthfeed/sex-education/sexually-repulsive,)
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