Dear Readers,
“Maybe my soulmate died, I don’t know, maybe I don’t have a soul… ” This is a part of the lyrics from the song “Maybe my soulmate died” by iamnotshane
Especially as an ace, it can feel impossible to find your soulmate—the person you share a special and unique bond with, your partner in crime, with whom you can communicate without using words.
But what if you have already found your soulmate and you don’t know it?
It feels like we have this fixed idea of what a soulmate should be like. We need to be in a relationship with them, it needs to be the love of our life!
But what if a soulmate comes in different shapes and sizes for all of us? What if our idea doesn’t match the reality and that’s why we don’t see that we already found our soulmate?
What´s the definition of a soulmate?
One would be:
“In the modern day, soulmate typically refers to a romantic or platonic partner, implying an exclusive lifelong bond. It commonly holds the connotation of being the strongest bond that one can achieve with another person.”
(Definition by Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soulmate#:~:text=6%20References-,Definition,person%20that%20one%20can%20achieve.)
Another one would be:
“a close friend or romantic partner with whom one has a unique deep connection based on mutual understanding and acceptance”
(Definition by https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/soulmate)
So if you think about your queerplatonic partners, your partners or your best friends, maybe they are your soulmates and have been all along?
I met who I consider my soulmate in my early 20s. I’ll share the story of how we met probably in another article. We have known each other for around 20 years now and we have been through some serious hardships as well as through some amazingly happy times. I know deep in my heart and my soul that we will spend the rest of our lives together. Annoying each other, screaming at each other, laughing with each other, supporting each other. But one thing is for sure as well, we will never, ever be in a romantic relationship.
It took me a while to understand that having a soulmate doesn’t necessarily come with a relationship. In my case, it comes with a unique, weird, and beautiful queerplatonic relationship? Friendship? Chosen family member?
So if you ask me, you can find your soulmate. The question is are you looking in the right place and are you willing to accept that the situation might not look like you imagined it?
So what do you think about soulmates? Or did you already find yours?
Best,
Ace
