Dear Readers,
I don’t want this blog to be negative because I’ve had so many good moments and talks in the last few months, but there’s also another side. The rejection, the silence, and the stupid excuses. Although I have to say the silent rejections are probably the ones that hurt the most. The ones that you don’t see coming.
I had a talk about this topic with friends recently, and they argued that due to online dating and the seemingly endless options we have, ghosting or stupid excuses for not being honest or not doing something have increased. Until the last couple of months, I actually would have disagreed, but the more I think about it, the more I think it´s true.
As an ace and someone who never really fit in where they grew up, the internet quickly became a place where I would find people I could connect with. I really rarely had that in real life. I learned to appreciate the possibility of connecting to someone that you would never have had the chance to talk or to even meet if the internet and dating platforms wouldn´t exist. This is valid for friendships as well as for relationships that would be in a friendship or relationship context.
In my eyes, this still is an opportunity at least for me, but I can see that for some this opportunity is indeed a good way of weaseling their way out of commitment of any kind. I´m not sure why it´s so difficult to just be honest and admit that you are not ready for a relationship or that you think that think that the connection you had at the beginning is slowly fading out because you don´t have as much in common as you initially thought you had. It happens. That´s normal. Not everybody you meet will be your best friend or your soulmate or whatever you are searching for.
Why is it that some people on the internet appreciate anonymity so much that they’ll be mean to people, but not be honest with them?
I don’t know how you feel about it.
But to me, this is starting to be very exhausting.
Best,
Ace